Life

well, really.. soetimes i wonder if i made th wrong choice of going into poly? or even th choice to even continue studying?


i can't freaking adapt to th bloody poly system even though i am a DPA student... th timetable now is so damn different from NPP times.. 


its so much more packed.. from 9am in th morning all th way to 5pm or even 8pm at night at times.. i am so bloody tired...


to those who freaking thinks that poly life is slack.. please change your mindset.. its even worst than secondary school.. 


th lecturers sometimes sucks to th max that you don't even bloody hell understand what they are saying? and then there's bloody hell tutorial tchers who just goes into class and tells you to open your laptop and start doing th work she gives when you are bloody clueless about that topic.. and when you ask her to teach, she just ignores you.. if not shows you redundant stuff?


my my, i think i would survive without you tchers? you bloody hell just throw work to us without teaching and expect us to know everything? hello, we are not those geniuses you see out there? if you are gonna do that, then might as well we don't have lessons. i go home and do it myself?


and then lecturers who just reads th slides out? uhmm, you can actually give us th slide and i go home read it myself? im sure i can do that as well as you can?


poly? maybe it isn't as great as i thought it would be? 


yes, my friends are nice.. in fact they are great.. but th thing is i can't adapt to poly, which sucks like alot.. 
i guess its th reason why i've been freaking cranky and moody..


yeahh, i have ppl telling me i laugh almost everyday in school, everytime i see someone i smile and act as if everything is fine and i am freaking happy.. i don't have much of a choie do i? 


every night i tell everyone i am going to sleep at like 12am? or maybe even earlier? but to be truthful, i don't... 


i keep away all distractions like my phone and my lappy and start reading through what my tchers have taught today.. cause i know that if i dont do that, i won't be able to sleep..


so every night this torture goes on and on.., i don't exactly sleep till 3am? yeahhh... cause if i don't understand th stuff taught, i won't be able to understand what is going to be taught th next day. so i don't have a choice do i?


i've been really cranky to those that i really know well.. like my panda and my son.. but then i guess it isn't th right thing to do? 


stressed out till this extent isn't something i have ever been through before.. and it really sucks. 


well, i can't do anything now other than to continue to smile and study even harder than usual... even if i have to sacrifice my sleep for it.. 


ugh. fuck my life. its all screwed up.. and i pretty much made my panda angry. fuck it kay? 


psht. whatever.


kthxbye.